The Guy's Rules
This is just too good not to share, even if it has nothing to do with home staging.At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys'side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear"the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rulesfromthe male side.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put itdown. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining aboutyou leaving it down. It takes less effort for you to let it down.
2. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.Let it be.
3. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it thatway.
4. Crying is blackmail.
5. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!Strong hints do not work!Obvious hints do not work!Just say it!1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
6. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's whatwe do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
7. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,all comments become null and void after 7 days.
8. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us toact like Chippendale guys.
9. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
10. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the waysmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
11. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
12. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.
13. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
14. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, forexample, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no ideawhat mauve is.
15. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing'swrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
16. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer youdon't want to hear.1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.
17. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discusssuch topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, fishing, or monster trucks.
18. You have enough clothes.
19. You have too many shoes.
20. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
21. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
posted by Barbara Jennings @ 5:12 PM
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